Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My Forever To Do List

I am realizing that I view my entire day as a list of "to do's." I get up in the morning and the first thing on the list is to get everyone out the door...dressed, fed, teeth brushed, necessities for the day in hand. Next comes either my list of things that must be done at home, or my list of things to accomplish before heading to work and then at work. I am constantly looking ahead to the next thing I need to check off the list. Spontaneous suggestions or events stress me out.

For instance, this morning my sister called. She was driving by my house on her way to Downtown Disney to check out the new resort they are opening. She wanted to see if Zach and I wanted to tag along. It probably would have only taken 2-3 hours. Truth is, I was not ready to go anywhere, with ratty hair and decked out in my cleaning clothes. Another truth is, I could have gotten ready in 15 minutes and gone, but my plan for the day (and every Wednesday) is to clean the house. What a missed opportunity!

Some would call it goal oriented, that is how I used to think of it. But when the constant need to "check things off the list" interferes with the joyful moments in my day, teachable moments with my kids, intimate moments with the Lord, etc...I think it takes being "goal oriented" to the extreme and makes my focus less on living a life that is pleasing to God and more on my control of things.

So I am heading to the truth, the Word, to find some ground to stand on. To look for some verses that remind me that my purpose here is not the "to do list," that my purpose is accomplished in my journey...if I keep my eyes focused!

Here is what I found that I am standing on in times of anxiety when I just want to get it all done so I can SIT DOWN:

"Blessed are those who dwell in your house; for they are ever praising you." Ps 84:4
"My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me." John 10:27
"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but the Lord's purpose will prevail." Proverbs 19:21

My Jesus Calling devotional this morning was about continually listening. "A mind preoccupied with planning pays homage to the idol of control." How timely.

Am I for real?

Am I for real blogging? I have to admit that I once made fun of my little sister for starting her own blog. Sorry Krissy! I just didn't "get" it at the time. I am behind the technology curve...and most other curves, actually.

I guess the draw to blogging for me is about not forgetting this season of life or the lessons it is teaching me. I wanted some way to document our life, and the craziness that goes with it. So, this is my attempt. Hopefully, it will work way better than the mother's journal that I have not written in since I was pregnant with my first child, who is now 7 years old!